No, Really Mam, Rigor Mortis Has Set In And Everything!

No, Really Mam, Rigor Mortis Has Set In And Everything!, a photo by hbmike2000 on Flickr.

Ok, in my defense, there are NO signs anywhere that say 'please do not say this sentence' at Disneyland.

While riding on Finding Nemo Submarine Voyage I noticed a scuba diver in the water. He looked just like the last one in the same spot I saw the previous trip. So, I turned to the Captain of the ship and said, Excuse me Mam, is that Scuba Diver dead? Ten saucer eyed kids stared at me then stared at the Captain awaiting her answer. No sir, she said, he is just resting. Ten kids with sweat on there brows all sighed in relief.

The ride ended and I was not convinced. It HAD to be the same Scuba Diver. I flew off the submarine and ran to the end of the line to ride again.

We soon came across the same Diver in the same spot. Once again I turned to the Captain, Mam I said, I really think that Scuba Diver is dead. Fifteen saucer eyed kids with tears on there cheeks stared at me, then at the captain to await her anwser. No sir she said through gritted teeth, he is just eating lunch. Fifteen saucer eyed kids with wet cheeks all sighed with relief.

There is no way he was eating lunch, his sandwich would get soggy. The ride ended and I ran to the end of the line to ride once more. I had to be sure.

Once again we came across the diver in the same spot. I turned to the Captain who was glaring at me, Mam, THAT Scuba Diver is DEAD! Twenty sets of saucered eyed kids stared at me, then at the Captain awaiting her answer. No SIR he is NOT ... I cut her off, No, Really Mam, rigor mortis has set in and everything! SIR she hollered, you have made EVERY kid on this Sub cry! I looked around me and replied, Technically all the kids passed out about a minute ago, it's the adults crying now.

With that, they opened the hatch and tossed me out of the sub.

So, the next time you are on Finding Nemo Submarine Voyage and you see a really ugly mermaid, thats me.

View on black or I'll pretend I am in the Blue Lagoon.

HSS